I was shown this video in group therapy at The Center for Women and Children in Crisis. At first I hated it (this is a very common response for me) because I thought my trauma too deep, too painful and too personal to be remedied by compassionate inner talk.
But he gives an example that changed my mind. He tells a story of a woman going out on her first date in years. She meets the man at a bar then he cuts the date short and leaves. She's really hurt and calls her best friend for support. Her best friend says something like "Well, what did you expect?! Your old and fat and who do you think you are wearing that dress?!" I was shocked! How could a friend say something like that when she was so clearly hurting?! Then Guy Winch pointed out that this is how we talk to ourselves. This really hit me. If I wouldn't talk to my friend (or even a stranger for that matter) with my inner dialog, why am I talking to myself like that? No one is going to love and support me like I can. I need to be my best friend, not my worst enemy.
I appreciated this video as it made me realize the power of my thoughts and inner dialog. I need to think loving and supportive thoughts about me, because I deserve and need it. We all do.
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